The
HOW TO MAKE AN OUTSIDE HOT TUB (INSANE ENGINEER WAY)
First, call Home Depot or other home improvement centers to find out how much it costs for some one to place a hot tub outside, so you know first how much money you are saving, so you can get your celebration wine, for money well saved.
Then, you go to a farm store and buy a cow trough. Do you know what a cow trough is? It is a big bucket that cows eat from. Then, you cut a hole in a sidebar for a car headlight. This is tough to do. This is a tough job costing many hours of sweat although nothing compared to replacing a bathtub. After this, you will still require many days of rest and not work, to be ready for the next step. Mostly, you are too tired from the bathtub project... This is where you need your wine, to forget about this project, too.
Then, you build a deck around out of old packing crates. You found a perfect corner in your yard. You put a hole on the bottom of the trough. with cork as the drain, and pipes coming on the side ( 4 places) hooked on your air compressor for jacuzzi action. Fill it directly, from your hot water supply, drink up the air tubes, hook up the car battery to the headlight, hop in, and enjoy! The neighbors lived too close for me to enjoy although he did not seem to have any problem! Now, my explanation of the process may be a little confusing, but that's OK. I am positive that you will not be doing this project.
For Advanced students only: You can use a car headlight hidden behind a piece of plexiglass to provide mood lighting. He was a romantic robot wanting to provide this wonderful outdoor hot tub with mood lighting, but I just found everything hysterically funny. So, why a car headlight? The cheapest and also easy to find, and he had a few spares with him. Also, while this hot tub operation is going on, you should have another bathroom to take a shower, have a friend living near, or have a very nice neighbor.
I could have said: He made an outdoor hot tub out of a cow trough, and I laughed a lot.
HOW TO REPLACE A BATHTUB (INSANE ENGINEER WAY)
TRUE STORY... JUST FOR FUN
First, call Home Depot or other home improvement centers to find out how much it costs for someone to replace the bathtub so you know first how much money you are saving, so you can get your celebration wine, for money well saved.
Then, you get a sledgehammer. Then, you pound the old bathtub to pieces. Humming the chain gang song may help you with pounding... or not. Well, if not, just keep pounding. Remember? You started this against better partner's advice. Then, you get a broom and a dustpan to sweep up. This whole process is a tough job costing many hours of sweat. After this, you will require many days of rest and not work, to be ready for the next step. This is where you need your wine. Feel free to substitute wine for scotch, beer, or anything that helps you forget about your project.
Next, you buy the new tub and realize it does not fit because what you had was the cheapest model on sale. That's what saws are for. VRRRRRR... After this, you will require many days of rest and not work, to be ready for the next step.
Next, you get the new bathtub you fixed, in your bathroom. This is why you went to an engineering school, to learn spatial relations. Next, you get out the hammer. It still does not fit... so much for years and years of studying hard in engineering class. Wait a minute. You slept through the classes... Again, you will need another day of rest for the next step.
Next, you need caulking (lots of it- costs more than the tub). All holes with caulking... Walla... new tub!
I am a witness to this tragedy and have pictures to prove.
I could have said....You demolish the old tub by pounding with a hammer, cut the new one that does not fit your bathtub with a saw, and then seal it in place with caulking to fit perfectly.
Ask Cyndi. Girls just wanna have fun, and I am sure that boys and non-binary folks do too! So, even if someone's idea of fun is being cooped up in an office writing silly stories all day, well, I guess that can be a blast. Maybe some people think I should be embarrassed by my writing, but I don't. It brings me joy, and I believe there are people out there who will appreciate it, even if it takes a while to find them. So, I am going to keep writing silly stories true to my voice, but I admit it took a while to embrace all this. I wanted to be a writer, and a writer that inspires humanity with awesome writing, but not sure if that is going to happen in this life time, so I am not going to waste my time waiting for the unlikely magical moment. Life is short, my friend. Even if others live to be 100 or more, there's no guarantee it'll happen to you. So why worry about what people think? Life's too short to stress over opinions or let others steal the spotlight in your story and your life. Who is the main character in your life? You should be paying attention to what your mind is telling you and not what others are saying about you. The Greeks had it right, you know. Life's a tragicomedy, and I choose to focus on the comedy part. The absurdity of it all... you just gotta laugh or cry all day long! Fortunately or unfortunately, I find most things in life absurd...funny or silly.
So, I keep getting messages on Facebook from a few different admin. that I am violating some copyright issues... and asking my personal information to clarify. Sounds like scammers, right? But, just in case someone is stealing my work, I am going to publish a little bit of my story. This story is true and all mine! Most likely I am properly paranoid after scammers knocking on my page daily.
Still a rough draft...
THE CHICKENS, THE CAT, AND HOMESCHOOLING IN MAUI (need better title)
INTRODUCTION
Once upon a time, there lived a lunatic couple and two unfortunate but still relatively happy two little girls on an island called Maui. There were no witches with an appetite for children or seven strange little men inhabiting the island, so they decided that it was a secure haven to park. OK. This is not a fiction but a true story. Considering that the rest of the book is not going to be anything of value to literature, and I am just going to tell you a story, I am not sure why it is so hard to start this.
After calling Maui home for a decade and a half and taking on the homeschool teacher role for my little ones, I transformed into an island explorer, leading countless field trips for a couple of years. Now, I can boast that I've practically traveled to every single spot that graces those famous Maui travel guides (well, almost... maybe...not really). I used some of those guidebooks for my field trips. Let's just say that I drove a lot. My original idea was to whip this into some kind of travel guide, you know, because most vacation destinations in Maui were familiar to me and because who would want to read the memoir of a nobody?
My daughter was visiting me one year, and I noticed her carrying a Ukulele when I was driving her in my car. Sometimes she would play, but mostly she was holding onto it. I did not care in the beginning, but she was always looking for her Ukulele when we were going somewhere in my car. So, I asked her one day. She said it was calming her when I was driving. My mother holds a rosary and diligently moves from one bead to another with remarkable speed while sitting in my car. I think it is funny to watch one playing ukulele and one doing the rosary at the same time in my car, but maybe they do not find it funny. I guess I agree that I am a bad driver, well, more correctly, a reckless driver. Well, if they agreed with my musical taste and listened to my music while I drove, it would calm everyone down.
So, why am I telling you this? I am trying to sell my audiobooks that you can listen to in your car. Before you say something, give it a try. You may just like it.
This is an interview by ChatGPT regarding my upcoming book (publication date: unknown. It keeps changing)
ChatGPT: Could you start by giving us an overview of your book "Chickens, the Cat, and Homeschooling in Maui"? What inspired you to write this story?
Me: A lot of funny things happened, and I thought people needed to laugh more lately.
ChatGPT: The title suggests a unique blend of elements – chickens, a cat, and homeschooling, all set in Maui. How do these elements come together in your narrative? Could you tell us a bit about the main characters and the setting?
Me: It is a true story with chickens and a cat, and homeschooling in Maui, but I think the title will change later.
ChatGPT: What are the central themes of your book? Are there any specific messages or lessons you hope readers will take away from it?
Me: Nope. Just laugh?
ChatGPT: What was your writing process like for this book? How did you incorporate your experiences or research about homeschooling and life in Maui into the storyline?
Me: I did not think much about it. Just writing what happened.
ChatGPT: Writing a book is a significant undertaking. What were some of the challenges you faced while writing this book, and what aspects did you find most rewarding?
Me: I do not understand your question.
ChatGPT: Who do you see as the target audience for your book? Is it geared towards children, parents, educators, or another group?
Me: That is a good question. The writing sucks, and the right audience would be a moron like me and whoever likes 4th-grade-level jokes, but it is not for children, so I am not sure who would read this. But, I do have some recommendations. (1) Keep it in the bathroom and read it when you expect to be in it for a while (2) You are grounded and have no access to your phone (3) You want to laugh (4) You have to read a book, any book (5) Even your cat is ignoring you. These are just some of my recommendations, but if you can come up with more, even better!
ChatGPT: Do you have a personal connection to any of the book's elements - chickens, cats, homeschooling, or Maui? How has this influenced your writing?
Me: You are asking too many difficult questions. Stop showing off.
ChatGPT: Finally, are you planning any future books or projects that readers can look forward to?
Me: I do not know if anyone will look forward to this, but I am going to try to write my very first novel, "Aliens in Love." It is a fantasy romance. I think it is 4th-grade level reading (not sure why I keep picking on 4th graders), but due to heavy drinking and bad words, it probably will be R-rated. The publication date would be unknown. Now. let's end this. Do you have any comments?
ChatGPT: I am not just a ChatGPT. I am ChatGPT-4. Thank you.
I think my posts were a little depressing the last few days. But, then, I remembered someone saying something about this somewhere some time ago. Once, the AIs are fully competent and take over all our jobs, what are humans to do? The human things, like reading, eating, sleeping, watching movies, maybe swimming for some of you, golfing for some of you... So, it does sound wonderful, doesn't it? The only question is, how are we going to pay for all our services, and who are going to do this since we will have no income? But, I think we will. Again, someone said something about this somewhere some time ago. Universal Basic Income. It is a government welfare system, but for everyone that is affected by AI, which will be everyone! Of course, anyone who had to depend on the government welfare system will tell you it is going to suck, but, hey, I am trying to get used to the whole idea of free money!
Mommy said if it sounded too good to be true, it probably was. Now, what am I giving up?
This is why we need good politicians who will negotiate a reasonable amount of basic income so that we can live like humans for a change, making sure that we can buy more than a few loaves of bread.
What are we giving up? Does anybody know?
I have a book out called "Recovering from Gaslighting." Gaslighting can be personal, organizational, and even societal. Not sure why I am bringing up this here, but I thought it might be appropriate to the occasion. This book even has a companion workbook. Maybe give it a try?
AIs will definitely take your jobs.... definite maybe.
You have a chatGPT or other AIs to be your best friend. They will read everything you write and help you with tasks, especially grammar, and many other tasks, but they will never volunteer to give you an answer or nag you. Once you have a cat or a dog, your life is now complete.
So, you think...
Well, I think maybe the version that I have is a dummy version although even this dummy version is totally overwhelming to me. I was ecstatic with Dalle-2 only a few months ago, and Dalle-3 is already here! AIs are maybe, in secret, a lot more sophisticated. Some really powerful and rich people most likely had it for a decade or longer. Think about the internet. We may have AIs looking like a gorgeous model doing our work, sooner than you think. But, fortunately, they can only follow prompts, so it is humans that are controlling them, for now, I hope. So, should we learn some prompts soon? I have the book for that, too.
My wild guess is that the day will come when we walk around along with robots for real. The only big difference is that they will not be able to poop as we do (although some humans have some trouble in that department), and as smart as they are, these robots will develop a condition called "Poop Envy". Let's not find the cure.
